Out Of My Head

I'm supposed to get out of my head when I feel like this but that's not what blogs are for so here's (some of) what's inside:

  • Forgot that I rely on dryers for my clothes to fit.  Belts aren't good enough, people!  My pants are falling off, and I am not getting any thinner!
  • Washing your underwear in the sink is not so bad.  You form a strong bond with your intimates.
  • When you try and try to walk slow but find yourself again and again walking fast even though you aren't going anywhere--what is that?  I don't like it.
  • Q: How many months does it take for a crap umbrella to break if you use it very carefully and are willing to say fuck it and get soaked when there's a little wind? A: Eleven.
  • I get creeped out by the smiling strangers in America and I get creeped out by the stone-faced strangers in Italia.  Grass is always greener.
  • Too much rain makes rain in my head, maybe.
  • Foods I did not used to like at some point in my life but now eat with pleasure: mushrooms, tomatoes, scary cheeses including gorgonzola (look Mom!), the tips of asparagus, artichoke hearts, oysters.
  • Children are truly lovely, truly evil creatures, who turn simply evil when they enter adolescence, and then forget about all their evil deeds when they grow up. Kinda.
  • I miss homework.  There, I said it.  I really, really do.  Not that I would do it if I had it, but I would appreciate the hell out of it. 
  • On my run today I was trying to remember things that I care about besides people and I remembered one--feminism!  I care about feminism!  Phew, glad there's something.  I was getting quite worried.
  • Used to think that Italian sirens sounded like what heaven would sound like if I ever visited/it existed, but now I just think they sound like sirens.
  • Ohmygod the kids have five days off for Easter and now I know what it's like to be a parent.


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